When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
