How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Randomize
