hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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