If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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