Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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