Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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