wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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