I am in a vortex of obligation.
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Randomize