Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
