How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
