wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I can't put those talents on a resume
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
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