Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Randomize