You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
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