bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Randomize
