I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize