I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
