Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
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