Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Nobody cheats on THIS.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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