You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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