marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.