I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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