So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Randomize