yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Found the puke drawer
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
