first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize