i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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