that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
