did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
