I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
