Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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