i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize