is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
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