Got a toothbrush?
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
