What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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