I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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