so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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