he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Randomize