Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I wear drunk well.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
