You can't motorboat a personality
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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