shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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