This girl is more easily done than said...
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I just forgot I was standing up.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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