Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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