We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
