She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Randomize
