its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
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