I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Randomize
