i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
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