Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Randomize