So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
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