So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
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