This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Best friends brother. Beat that.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
