we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
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